Becoming a Warm Demander in Higher Ed: Empowering Students Through Care and Challenge

Sarah Gonser’s recent article on Edutopia got me reflecting on the idea of the warm demander, an educator who combines high expectations with genuine empathy. The approach has been widely discussed in K–12 settings, where it helps teachers balance rigor with care in ways that can transform classrooms. But what does this look like in higher education?

The warm demander stance still holds power in college and university classrooms, though it often takes a different form. Instead of centering on classroom management, it emerges through mentorship, the push toward academic excellence, and the cultivation of authentic connection. In this post, I want to explore how higher education faculty can embrace the role of a warm demander—and how doing so supports student growth and re-centers the joy that makes teaching meaningful and sustainable.

1. Elevating rigor with respect

What Edutopia says

Warm demanders believe deeply in their students’ potential. They are not harsh; instead, their insistence on high standards is rooted in respect. As Lisa Delpit puts it, they “expect a great deal of their students, convince them of their own brilliance, and help them to reach their potential in a disciplined and structured environment”.

What that looks like in higher ed

• Set clear, ambitious learning outcomes. From day one, communicate precise academic expectations—like essay quality, research rigor, or critical engagement—and scaffold students toward them.
• Frame ambitious standards as trust. Let students know: “I’ve seen the brilliance in your drafts; now I want to see it polished.”  Rather than focusing on deficiencies, frame the rigor as part of your belief in their ability to do great things.

2. Consistency builds trust

What Edutopia says

Warm demanders build trust through follow-through and reliability. They are dependable adults who maintain a safe and structured learning environment.

What that looks like in higher ed

• Apply classroom policies uniformly. Be it participation, submission deadlines, or peer review, stick to your policies and follow through. This means designing policies that allow for the inevitable course changes and life events that occur throughout a semester and consistently applying those policies.
• Transparent grading and feedback schedules. If you set the expectation of returning feedback within a week, honor that commitment. When delays happen, communicate them openly. Beyond timeliness, make your grading process visible: explain how you arrive at a grade, highlight students’ strengths, and point to areas for continued growth.
• See the syllabus as a shared agreement. Instead of treating the syllabus as a static rulebook, frame it as a roadmap for shared expectations and rhythms of learning. Use clear, student-friendly language and policies that set standards and signal your commitment to supporting students’ growth.

3. Warmth without compromise: Lead with empathy and curiosity

What Edutopia says

Warm demanders avoid assumptions. When students miss deadlines or check out of class participation, they ask questions rather than judge, and they celebrate successes, both big and small.

What that looks like in higher ed

• Look beneath the behavior. If a student seems disengaged or is not participating, reach out privately with curiosity rather than assumption. A simple, “I’ve noticed this, what might be getting in the way?” can open the door for further insight. Knowing that someone has noticed and cares is often enough to re-engage a student.
• Celebrate effort and progress. While grades tend to dominate students’ attention, recognition can take many other forms. Point out when undergraduates wrestle successfully with complex readings or send a quick note when graduate students turn in a strong draft. Let your enthusiasm show and make space to value persistence and growth alongside achievement.
• Invite students’ stories. Encourage students to share their learning journeys, strengths, challenges, and cultural contexts through reflection activities, discussion boards, or class conversation. These narratives deepen community and remind students that their perspectives matter.
• Share your own learning moments. Share moments when student work has shaped your thinking or when teaching a particular idea has reminded you why you love the classroom. This vulnerability humanizes you and reinforces the idea that learning is a shared, ongoing process.

4. Embrace individual identity and experience

What Edutopia says

Effective warm demanders understand their students' individual and cultural backgrounds and adjust their pedagogy to ensure everyone feels respected and capable of rigorous engagement.

What that looks like in higher ed

• Include diverse perspectives in the curriculum. Select readings and examples that reflect a variety of cultures, disciplines, and voices. Exposure to other viewpoints challenges students to evaluate their own views critically.
• Reflect on your own cultural lens. Be aware of your norms around participation, tone, and feedback, and be open to student interpretations that may differ. Find ways to scaffold the hidden curriculum of academia with explicit instructions and a safe environment to practice these new skills.
• Be open to different expressions of engagement. For example, some students participate more through writing, others through discussion. Make space for this by offering options, but also creating a safe environment where students are encouraged to gently challenge themselves to do things that stretch their comfort zone.

5. How you show up matters

The heart of being a warm demander is not only in what you teach but also in how you show up. Your tone, expressions, and body language can communicate belief in students long before you say a word. When students feel your genuine joy in teaching, they recognize that your expectations come from a place of belief in their potential rather than from duty alone. Joy brings energy and resilience to the work, allowing you to hold students to high standards while still leading with compassion.

What that looks like in higher dd

• Invite ideas with warmth. When posing challenging questions, let your nonverbal cues, like a smile or attentive eye contact, signal that you are genuinely interested in students’ contributions.
• Nurture deeper thinking. Use follow-up questions to push ideas further, scaffolding complexity in ways that show both curiosity and care. Students are more willing to stretch when they feel their thinking is valued.
• Share your passion. You have invested years, or even decades, in your field, and your enthusiasm can be contagious. When you need to enforce a standard, keep the moment of firmness brief, then return to an encouraging stance that communicates your love for the subject.
• Own your missteps. If your tone comes across more sharply than intended, acknowledge it openly. Modeling accountability builds trust and demonstrates that respectful dialogue applies to everyone in the classroom.

In conclusion: The warm demander as mentor

In higher education, professors are more than content experts; they are mentors, guides, and models of intellectual curiosity and rigor. Embracing the stance of a warm demander means holding students to ambitious standards while also affirming their brilliance and humanity. This approach invites students to stretch, to struggle productively, and ultimately to succeed. When warmth and rigor work in tandem, classrooms become more than sites of performance; they become spaces where students truly flourish.

References:

Bird, L. (2024, November 12). Becoming a warm demander - teaching with Orff. Teaching With Orff - An Online Oasis for Movement & Music Educators. https://teachingwithorff.com/becoming-a-warm-demander

Gonser, S. (2025, August 27). 4 characteristics of outstanding “warm demander” teachers. Edutopia. https://www.edutopia.org/article/how-to-be-a-warm-demander-teacher

Hammond, Z., & Jackson, Y. (2015). Culturally responsive teaching and the brain: Promoting authentic engagement and rigor among culturally and linguistically diverse students. Corwin, a SAGE Company.

Kleinfeld, J. (1975). Effective teachers of Eskimo and Indian students. The School Review, 83(2), 301–344. https://doi.org/10.1086/443191

Portland Community College. (n.d.). Warm Demander Pedagogy: Online Learning at PCC. Portland Community College. https://www.pcc.edu/online/2022/02/warm-demander-pedagogy/